Friday, May 12, 2006, 08:23 AM - Stupid Criminals
What I’ve Learned About Islam:
1. It’s a sin to drink alcohol. It’s not a sin, however, to smoke marijuana, snort cocaine, or shoot heroin (or do all three concurrently!)
2. It’s a sin to eat pork. It’s not a sin, however, to lie, steal, forge documents, kite checks, smuggle guns, or deal drugs.
3. Homosexuality is a sin. It’s not a sin, however, to father 5 or 6 illegitimate children by 5 or 6 different women and then never pay a dime in child support.
4. Muslim folk are apparently supposed to hate America. This hatred, however, doesn’t preclude them from collecting welfare, food stamps, Section-8 housing subsidies, Medicaid, and bogus “disability” income.
5. Americans are supposed to hold Islam in the highest respect. It’s okay, however, for Muslims to harass, harm, or even murder anyone who doesn’t follow Islam.
6. “Pride” isn’t about doing things that make other people proud of you. Most Muslims demonstrating “pride” actually just demonstrate arrogance, rudeness, and contempt.
7. Suicide is a sin. Strapping a bomb to yourself so that you can blow up a school bus full of elementary school children is a holy act.
8. Shaving one’s beard is a sin. Paying a surgeon to mutilate your wife’s genitals, however, is not a sin.
9. Middle East poverty is the fault of America and Israel. The fact that the ruling families of each Middle Eastern country are all mega-billionares who don’t spend a red cent on their respective country’s infrastructure is simply a co-incidence.
10. When disasters happen in Islamic countries, the United States is supposed start cutting checks. When disasters happen in America, Muslims worldwide (including those in the USA) dance in the street and praise Allah.
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( 3 / 1768 )Saturday, May 6, 2006, 01:52 PM - Cool Stuff
Now, some people drive really conservatively because they don’t know how to drive. Other people, like myself, just don’t like getting tickets. But I *do* occasionally like to push the pedal to the floor. So when Doug and I were heading out this morning and Doug said, “You have to drive faster because we’re running late,” I replied, “You don’t have to ask me twice!”
I got my little Civic Hybrid up to 95 MPH on i83, and you could *really* hear the electric motor whine! I drained 85% of the battery pack in 5 minutes with this driving! Then I took the exit ramp so fast that two of the car’s wheels almost came off the ground. Slowing down for the ramp brought the battery pack up to 45%. Then I gloated on the Beltway as we blew past a SUV that almost seemed like it was standing still, and some dude who was actually reading the Baltimore Sun while driving. Again, I drove the battery down to 20% with 90+ MPH driving. When we exited on Greenspring Avenue, it had this long, straight downhill segment that allowed the kinetic energy recovery system to boost power back to 80%. At the bottom of the hill I floored it again. There’s nothing as exciting as driving 87 in a 30 MPH residential neighbourhood! Driving the batteries down to 25% again, we sped into the parking lot with a mighty screech and the smell of smouldering rubber.
I love to drive!
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( 3 / 1369 )Friday, May 5, 2006, 07:39 PM - Random Thoughts
Yay! Another fun LIST from Hanuman's website!
1. If you could be any person in the world, who would you be, and why? Heck, I’m already FIVE people!
2. Describe a place you remember from your childhood. I remember visiting my grandfather (years before he got sick with cancer and died.) He used to cut my hair when I was six to eight years old. Sometimes he would take me and mom out to the golf course restaurant to eat brunch after church. I remember he was one of the first people to own an Atari 2600, and I was totally obsessed with “Breakout” and “Combat”. I remember how awesome it was the year he built a swimming pool in the back year of his house.
3. How did you meet your closest friend?
My closest friend is also my partner. The hilarious thing is that I had run a personal ad in which I described myself as, “An average guy who likes really bad movies, reading cheap paperbacks, and playing Dungeons & Dragons”. Doug had just moved from Memphis to Baltimore and had read my ad in the City Paper and found it to be the only one that didn’t gloat over the length/width of various appendages. The rest is history. 5/15/06 will be our 7th anniversary.
4. What is something you do well?
I am very good at assimilating existing concepts in different ways in order to create something new. A lot of my writing is like that. My roleplaying game has certain elements of six different games, along with a lot of original content. I’m also good at multitasking and creative writing.
5. What would have happened if you didn't leave the house this morning?
I’d probably lose my job, since I am a probationary employee for another seven months!
6. If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would you go?
Ireland. If there is anywhere on Earth that really has a Twilight Gate, it will be Ireland.
7. What sets you apart from the crowd?
I have a very unique sense of humor while at the same time being a total workaholic.
8. What do you want to be remembered for? I’d like to be remembered as a good person, whose faith prevailed in the face of some truly horrible catastrophes and abuses.
9. What is the nicest thing you have done for someone?
I don’t know. It all depends on how the beneficiary of the good deed interpreted my help. I rarely go out of my way to be mean to people – except for hurling curses at the junkie beggars.
10. What is the greatest lesson you've learned so far in your life?
God rewards the people who have hurt me the most.
11. What is your favorite day of the week? Saturday (the workweek is over, and the weekend has just begun!).
12. How old would you be if you didn't know your real age? 24.
13. Name some things you are thankful for. For Doug (my partner); for Nancy Stavely (the choirmaster at my church); for having decent health; for having enough food to eat; for having a new job that I enjoy; for being able to retain my faith through the dark years; for being able to write creatively; for being able to retain some measure of sanity in the aftermath of being on the receiving end of many years of child abuse; for finally making peace with being gay.
14. What was your favorite childhood toy?
I had a stuffed animal that was in the shape of a shark.
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( 3 / 1270 )Friday, May 5, 2006, 05:41 PM - Dumb Happenings
Y'know. . . I never thought I would find a type of cheese that I DIDN'T like. But last night, I managed to do just that. There's a Wegmans' grocery store in the Baltimore and Wegmans is the Mecca of grocery stores. I's got a huge aisle dedicated just to CHEESE. So Doug and I have been trying out a new kind of cheese each week.
Well, I tried this imported German cheese (with the writing in German, and an English translation in very small print). It was just listed as "traditional German semi-soft cheese". I cut the package open and the first thing that I noticed is that the cheese smelled like POOP! I'm not kidding! The cheese was also really oily. The "semisoft" texture was the same consistancy as poo also.
UUURRRGGHHH!!!!!!
It looked like cheese, but that was about it. I almost threw up when I took a good whiff. It went right into the trash.
It was only then that I thought: Are the Germans actually KNOWN for making good cheese? :P
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( 3 / 991 )Wednesday, May 3, 2006, 09:35 PM - Random Thoughts
My fifth probationary performance review went well. As an entry-level law enforcement agent, I'm on probationary status for a whole year. What a drag! The trainee pay is pretty low too. But at least in seven more months, I get made permanent, I get a promotion from Investigator-trainee to Investigator-I, and I get a $5000/Year raise.[ 2 comments ] ( 6 views ) | [ 0 trackbacks ] | permalink |
( 3 / 1257 )Wednesday, May 3, 2006, 09:13 PM - Random Thoughts
I had a dreaded dentist appointment today. I have to go in for a checkup every three months instead of every six Because my teeth are so weak. And my teeth are weak because of the malnutrition and neglect I experienced when I was a kid. I've probably spent about $3,000 per year for the past seven years getting my teeth fixed.
But today, the dentist actually didn't find anything wrong! It was really just an ordinary exam! Maybe my teeth will finally hold up for a while.
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( 3 / 1452 )Tuesday, May 2, 2006, 08:13 PM - Cool Stuff
Doug has lost 22 pounds on his weight loss plan. He lost two pounds this week. I am REALLY proud of him!
A lot of people in his family are big, but he's bucket genetics! I am really happy for him!
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( 3 / 1330 )Monday, May 1, 2006, 05:26 PM - Cool Stuff
I added a forum for my roleplaying game (located at www.gaianar.com) It's pretty cool. I don't know how many of the readers here enjoy Dungeons & Dragons, but I wrote a roleplauying game from scratch that is in the fantasy RPG genre. The big difference here is that my game is FREE, heh heh.
Aside from game topics, I'm going to use the forum to host political rants as well (including a special section dedicated to bashing Bush!)
If anyone wants to check it out, just visit my RPG site and click the "Gaianar Forum" icon on the lefthand menu bar
World of Gaianar
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( 3 / 1364 )Friday, April 28, 2006, 01:40 PM - Dissociation & Switching
Choir practice is always a fun activity. Sometimes I think that I enjoy the practice sessions more than the actual church service.
Most of my music capability comes from Thistle. There are times that he just seems to shine with goodness, energy, and purity. I wish I had those features. For me, the instances of shining are few and far between indeed.
I don’t know why my integration centred on Indigo instead of Thistle. I’m not as nice a person and I tend to be more judgmental and aggressive. Thistle does not have these moral failings. He also never has doubts of faith.
If the integration had somehow made Thistle the primary personality, I wonder if I would be in ministry now instead of law enforcement? I know I’d be a lot thinner than I am now because angels don’t eat, ha ha.
I guess that I sometimes become aware of what a broken and morally flawed individual I am, and how Thistle is *not* broken or morally flawed. I guess that’s the difference between being a human and being an angel.
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( 2.9 / 1809 )Thursday, April 27, 2006, 08:55 AM - Cool Stuff
Last night’Doug and I had dinner with Larry, my friend and former supervisor. The company I used to work for closed 90% of its stores. In the late 1990s, we had 80 locations and now the company has EIGHT. Larry runs the last remaining store in Maryland.
He seemed to be doing okay. His wife went back to work now that his income has dropped 75%. On the other hand, he doesn’t work 65-hour work weeks anymore either.
Somehow, Doug and I got talked into helping him sell wireless phones at a baseball game on May 12th. Ha ha ha! Doug has never been in sales. On the other hand, I’m not one to turn down some easy side-money!
The thing to know about the cell phone industry is that it is rapidly moving away from a brokered/contracted product. I predict that within five years, cell phones will just be sold “off the shelf” without contract or credit check. The end user will just key in a credit card number and use on-screen prompts to select rate plans and features.
Personally, I don’t sign contracts anymore. The “full” price of a phone is a lot less than the early termination fee. Besides, most “free” phones on contract are junk.
It was nice meeting up with Larry again, however. We had pizza and salad at Pizza Hut. It was a pleasant evening.
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